It is common to see signs requiring that dogs be kept on leash. Much of humanity could do with similar restraints.
Grade school. I don’t miss diagramming sentences.
If I could talk to the dog I’d lead with, “Would you like something to drink other than water? You know, for a change.”
It’s best to remain above the fray lest you become part of it.
Belts or suspenders. Choose one. Never both simultaneously.
-klem
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