A Las Vegas Alley, alternate ending

A reader of this blog requested an alternate ending to Saturday’s ‘A Las Vegas Alley’ post. It is my pleasure to comply.


A Las Vegas Alley, alternate ending


I was in Vegas with a friend of mine. We’ll call him Jones. It was late Sunday afternoon and we were en route to the freeway to drive home. We were at a traffic signal waiting for a left turn arrow. There had already been several greens, but only a few cars were trickling through per signal.

Across the street to the left was an alley, and in this alley were five or so guys. One of the alley dwellers crossed the street and approached me.

"If you pull in over there (pointing to the alley), I can fix that dent," pointing to the dent over my front left fender.

Eager to have the unsightly blemish repaired, I swing a U-turn at the green arrow.

After pulling into the alley I exited the vehicle and extended a hand to greet the artisan. A knuckle sandwich was awaiting me making direct and solid contact with my nose. I collapsed like a heap of wet towels. Jones bolted out of the car and put forth a scrappy effort, so he told me later, but also succumbed to the violence of several aggressors.

Five minutes passed.

"You can stop playing dead. They’re gone," said a bludgeoned Jones tapping me with his shoe.

The vehicle had miraculously not been vandalized nor tires slashed. The keys were still in the ignition, car door ajar, with a beeping emanating from the vehicle warning not to lock the keys in the cab.

Swollen nose and various other wounded parts and blood stained clothes, we got back in the car and drove away in silence. Would have been nice to get a cool drink for the drive, but our wallets were long gone. So also were our adversaries.

The fender dent remained sorely visible as if now mocking my naiveté.


-klem